Archive for the ‘Funny and Stupid Jokes for Kids’ Category

Stupid Classroom Jokes

Monday, November 14th, 2011

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because the students were so bright.

Why was the math book sad?
It had too many problems.

What’s the capital of Arkansas?
A.

What do math teachers eat?
Square meals.

Did you hear about the delivery van loaded with thesauruses that crashed into a taxi?
Witnesses were astounded, shocked, taken aback, surprised, startled, dumbfounded, thunderstruck, caught unawares…

Why did the teacher put rubber bands on her students’ heads?
So they could make snap decisions.

Why did the 25-watt bulb flunk out of school?
He wasn’t very bright.

Stupid Language Joke

Sunday, August 29th, 2010

The mouse was taking her offspring out in search of food when they were confronted by a cat. Immediately, the mouse began barking like a dog. Frightened, the cat ran away.

Turning back to her children, the mouse mother announced, “That shows you the importance of learning a second language!”

The Good ol’ Muffin Joke

Tuesday, January 13th, 2009

Two muffins were sitting in the oven

One turns to the other and says, “Wow it’s hot in here!”

The other muffins says, “Woah! A talking muffin!!!”

Pokeman Bathroom

Friday, December 5th, 2008

1. Why shouldn’t you take a pokemon into the bathroom?

He might Pikachu.

Stupid Questions

Monday, April 21st, 2008

If a person with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, would it be considered as a hostage situation?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all?”

Is there another word for synonym?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone would clean them?

Why do they put Braille on drive-through bank machines?

How is it possible to have a “civil war?”

If one syncronized swimmer drowns, do the other swimmers drown too?

Stupid and Funny Jokes About Children

Wednesday, April 16th, 2008

Joke #1:

There was this one boy who was on someone’s doorstep on his tiptoes trying to reach the doorbell. A man sees the boy struggling and goes up to the boy.

“Would you like me to ring the doorbell for you?” asked the man

“Yes please,” the boy replied.

The man reached up and rang the doorbell and smiled at the boy. “Now what?” he asked.

“I don’t know about you sir,” said the boy, “but I’m gonna run like heck!”

Joke #2:

So there was this third grade teacher who was trying to get her students enthusiastic about the picture day.

“Remember to bring $5 and wear a nice outfit. In future years, you’ll love looking at these pictures. You’ll be able to say, “Hey! That’s Jessica! She became a nurse!” or That’s Robbie! He became a movie star!”

A student from the back of the class pitched in.

“And that’s the teacher! She’s dead!”

Joke #3:

A mother was sitting with her 6-month-old child on a train. A man across from them sat and stared at the child and finally said, “Man, that is one UGLY baby!’

Extremely upset, the women cried, “How could you say that?!? That is very horrible! You should be put in jail for saying something like that!”

A security guard came to the scene and asked the woman, “What’s the problem?”

Weeping and gasping for breath, the woman replied, “That man…so horrible….!

“Calm down, said the guard, “everything is going to be fine. The man is gone and there is no need to be worried. Relax. Would you like a glass of water?”

“Yes thank you,” replied the woman.

“Sure thing,” said the guard, “And you know what? I’ll even bring a banana for your monkey.”

   

Funny Fish Joke

Saturday, October 6th, 2007

Q: What do you call a fish with lgs?

A: A Two-knee fish!

Funny snail and turtle joke

Thursday, June 7th, 2007

Q: What did the snail say when he hitched a ride on the turtle’s back?

A: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Funny Chicken joke

Thursday, June 7th, 2007

Here’s a pretty funny chicken joke:

Q: What did the chicken say when she saw scrambled eggs?

A: What a crazy, mixed up kid.

Funny Chicken Feathers Joke

Thursday, June 7th, 2007

Q: Which side of the chicken has the most feathers?

A: The outside